When I have to communicate with my partner/abuser in person, or by telephone and s/he becomes abusive, l can _____________________________________________.

When I have contact with my past abuser at my home and I expect we are going to have an argument, I will try to move to a space that is lowest risk, such as _____________________________________________ (Try to avoid arguments in the bathroom, kitchen, garage, near weapons or in rooms without access to an outside door.)

I will use my judgment and intuition. I have to protect myself until I/we are out of danger. If the situation is very serious, I can: _____________________________________________.

I can tell the following people about the past violence and request they call the police if they hear suspicious noises coming from my home:

1. _________________________________
2. _________________________________
3.  _________________________________

I will use ______________ as my code word with my children/family/friends so they can call for help.

Safety when preparing to leave.

Victims sometimes need to leave the residence they share with the abusive partner. Abusers often explode when they believe that a victim is leaving the relationship. Leaving home must be done with a careful plan in order to increase safety.

If the violence reoccurs or if I am afraid the violence will reoccur and I decide to leave, I can enhance my/our safety by doing some or all of the following.

If I have to leave my home, I will go _____________________________________________ (decide this even if you don’t think there will be a next time.)

I can leave copies of important documents, an extra set of car and/or house keys, money and extra clothes with _____________________________________________.

I will have important phone numbers accessible to my children and myself. The phone located nearest to my home is located: _____________________________________________.

I will check with the following people to see who would be able to let me stay with them:

1. _________________________________
2. _________________________________
3. _________________________________

In Washington State, the Domestic Violence Hotline number is 1-800-562-6025.

I can seek shelter by calling my local Domestic Violence program number – ______________.

When I leave I will need to take:

• Identification for myself (driver’s license or ID)
• Social security cards for all family members
• Birth certificates for all family members
• School and vaccination records for children
• DSHS identification
• Medications for all family members
• Divorce/custody papers
• Work permits/green card/passports
• Money/check book/ATM-credit cards/bank book
• Children’s favorite toys/blankets
• Items of special sentimental value
• Medical records
• Lease/rental agreement, mortgage payment book, house deed
• House and/or car keys

Safety on the job and in public.

Each victim must decide if and when they will tell others that their partner has abused them and that they may still be at risk. Friends, family and co-workers can help to protect victims. Each victim should consider carefully which people to invite to help secure their safety.

I can inform the following people at my work and ask them to help screen my calls during work hours:

1. _________________________________
2. _________________________________
3. _________________________________

When driving home if problems occur, I can: _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________.

If I use public transit, I can: _____________________________________________.

I can also do the following to enhance my safety: _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________.

Safety and my emotional health.

The experience of being battered and verbally degraded is usually exhausting and emotionally draining. The process of building a new life takes incredible energy and courage.

I can do some of the following to increase my self-confidence, gain support and strengthen my relationships with other people.

Whenever I feel others are trying to control or abuse me, I can tell myself: _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________.

To gain support I can attend workshops and support groups at _____________________________________________.

If I feel discouraged and ready to return to a potentially abusive situation, I can _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________.

Other things l can do to help me feel stronger are: _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________.

Telephone numbers I need to know:

Police Department, from home – 911 or ______________
Police Department, from school/work – 911 or ______________
Support Person ____________________
Local Domestic Violence Program ____________________
Other Support Resources ____________________ ____________________ ____________________

Violence hurts you and your children forever.
La violencia le causa dano usted ya a sus ninos, para siempre.

You didn’t cause the violence, but you can end it! Please get help!

All calls are confidential. If you are in need of immediate assistance please hang up and dial 911.