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Violence is really only an isolated event. There isn’t much of it happening.

Reality: One out of every 15 relationships is currently experiencing the sort of violence that will send the victim to the hospital.

Domestic violence only happens to poor people or minorities.

Reality: Abuse can happen in any household, regardless of race, economic background or educational level.

The victim "makes the partner hit them" by "getting in their face." They "ask for it."

Reality: Every relationship has arguments and stress, but most people don’t hit others when they get angry. An abuser has limited skills to deal with stress.

The victim actually enjoys the attention, needs the violence or is a perpetual victim.

Reality: Victims do not want to be hit. The abuser’s violence is his/her own responsibility.

The abuser is a sick or crazy monster, angry all the time.

Reality: An abuser can be passive, a "nice person" generous to others and sensitive. Anyone could be an abuser.

Alcohol or a bad marriage is the cause of violence.

Reality: Most abusers hit whether drunk or sober. Alcohol/substance abuse can reduce the ability to control behavior.

Resources    |   What Is Domestic Violence?    |   Domestic Violence Myths    |   Cycle of Violence
Personal Safety Plan    |   Friends and Family    |   Support Groups    |   Collaborative Relationships

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